Back of the Net will return on July 20

Back of the Net's huge writing team are taking a hard-earned week off to prepare for the new season.

If your football satire levels reach a dangerously low level then visit our Back of the Net Wiki, which now has over 150 entries, including:

POINTLESS COMPETITIONS - Over the recent history of football, a large amount of time and effort has been wasted playing needless competitions... More

JOEY BARTON - One of the worst men there has ever been... More

JIM ROSENTHAL - A bits and pieces man for ITV who unconvincingly presents any sport put in front of him while looking like the devil... More

GARY NEVILLE - An inadequately moustachioed right back who plays for Manchester United and England... More

MARK LAWRENSON - A key component in Liverpool’s greatest ever defence, but he has overshadowed that achievement by becoming one of football’s most universally unpopular pundits... More

NEWCASTLE UNITED - A Championship club with a proud history of footballing mediocrity and administrative failure... More